


Midnight Paradox

by neko_kirin3104



Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: Crossdressing, Fairy Tale Retellings, Humor, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-24
Updated: 2013-10-24
Packaged: 2017-12-30 08:07:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1016176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neko_kirin3104/pseuds/neko_kirin3104
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Satoshi Ohno is a well-mannered executive producer, virtuous to a fault. Sho Sakurai is a two-bit actor hired to mess with his head... or so he thinks.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Midnight Paradox

Being thus decked out, she got up into her coach; but her godmother, above all things, commanded her not to stay past midnight, telling her, at the same time, that if she stayed one moment longer, the coach would be a pumpkin again, her horses mice, her coachman a rat, her footmen lizards, and that her clothes would become just as they were before.

  
**—Cinderella** by _Charles Perrault_  


∞•∞•∞•∞•∞

 

 

The show was called _The Ultimate Dokkiri TV_.

Sho Sakurai had nothing to do with it, didn’t want to have any involvement with it, and would have absolutely stayed a mile away from it, had it not for Nino calling him up one day claiming owed favors and eventually resorting to blackmail when Sho as much as tried questioning his wily friend’s sanity.

Nino only had to mention _Perky Lumps_ and he knew he was screwed.

 

∞•∞•∞•∞•∞

  
  
Satoshi Ohno was supposedly made of ice, or so Sho was told. The well-respected executive producer of a couple dozens of successful films in the recent years would never give favors of any kind to people, not even to his friends, unless there’s real talent involved.

No actress, pro and amateur alike, had ever succeeded in seducing him for a bit part, or even shamelessly for a lead role in the movies he funded.

“That’s just not the way the virtuous Satoshi Ohno rolls,” Nino said.

Jun Matsumoto, highly-acclaimed movie and concert director and proud instigator of tonight’s prank, wanted to challenge his friend’s moral perspectives by setting him up for a no-holds-barred seduction on national TV.

His reason?

“He wants to prove his friend has a fully functioning dick,” Nino said. “It’s a scary thing when rich people get bored, ne.”

And Sho Sakurai, with his inherently rotten luck in _everything_ , just had to get caught in the middle of it all, in a curly black wig, a little red dress, and a pair of C-cup fake boobs strapped to his chest.

“Why does it have to be me, again?!” he asked, frowning at his image in the mirror.

“Because it’s _funnier_ ,” Nino sneered.

 

∞•∞•∞•∞•∞

  
  
This must be how Cinderella felt like going to the ball.

Except that Cinderella didn’t come to the party to screw the prince over.

The huddle of curious eyes that bore on him the moment he stepped into the lobby of Jun Matsumoto’s mansion so overwhelmed Sho that his legs literally stopped functioning. He suspected they stopped being legs too, when he began feeling wobbly just from standing still.

Could legs actually turn to jelly at a moment’s notice?

_“To your right, J-san’s looking at you. Give him a smile.”_

The keyed up man instinctively flinched at the prickling buzz in his ear, but dutifully turned as he poked the raucous device lodged in his ear hole. “I am going to kill you for this, Nino...” he mumbled around the shy smile he gave to the events host, who responded with a small nod, a smaller smirk, and a pointing finger directing him to where he’s supposed to be.

There, at the farthest end of the bar on the other side of the room was the hunched form of the man who supposedly had the _holiest_ dick in the whole Japanese entertainment industry.

That’s going to change tonight, of course.

As if to mock him on cue, Sho’s fake boobs began to slip out of place.

 

∞•∞•∞•∞•∞

  
  
“Can I take this seat?” he asked in the husky lady voice he had practiced the previous night until he was blue in the face.

Ohno looked at him and nodded with a grin before turning his attention back to his phone.

“This your first singles mixer?” Sho ventured to ask again after he settled into the bar stool.

Ohno nodded and hummed. “I’m not here to mingle, though.”

If there ever was a polite way to tell a person to get lost, this man seemed to have perfected the skill.

But it would take more than that to deter a man like Sho, especially when his whole career, and quite possibly his _life_ , depended on this moment.

“Maaaa, aren’t you missing out on all the fun?!”

“Not really,” Ohno mumbled calmly, his eyes and thumbs still fixed on his phone. “Just here to support Matsujun’s cause.”

“By texting your girlfriend?” he teased.

Ohno chuckled lightly and raised his phone to show him the screen. “Playing a game.”

“Aaah... Your girlfriend must be so proud.”

“Maybe. If she exists.”

“She doesn’t?!” Sho felt he didn’t really need to know, but it still made his heart flutter a little.

Especially when Ohno finally set aside his phone and swiveled his bar stool to face him.

“I’m Ohno. Satoshi Ohno.”

“Shoko,” he said with his sweetest smile. “ _Just_ Shoko.”

His skin prickled with gooseflesh when their palms crossed for the obligatory handshake.

Maybe this man’s dick wasn’t so dead after all.

 

∞•∞•∞•∞•∞

  
  
It felt a lot like _Perky Lumps_ all over again.

The irony of it was that, he was fully clothed this time and he had never felt more naked in his entire life.

Well, the empire waist dress was off-shouldered and he did have to shave his armpit hair so he didn’t look ridiculous in it.

And the skirt only reached down to half of his thighs, so come to think of it, he wasn’t all that _fully_ clothed to begin with.

But still, the way Satoshi Ohno was looking at him right now brought back memories of that time he had to grudgingly accept a role in a tacky gay porno just so he could pay his overdue rent and not get kicked out on the streets.

_Perky Lumps_ was the worst misstep in his career he swore never to take again.

But people took longer to get over it and could still, to this day, recognize him better from it than from all his hard-earned bit parts on TV.

Nino got rid of as much traces of that movie as he could find, and had always used this fact to keep Sho on a tight leash when it came to claiming favors.

“So, you’re an actress,” Ohno said before taking a small sip of whisky from his sixth glass, his unwavering gaze playful and lewd.

“Uh-huh,” Sho mumbled, playfully teasing the edge of his cocktail glass with a long, fake fingernail while trying all his best not to lose his mind. He would forever be grateful for his naturally high tolerance for alcohol. “Just bit parts, though. And never on movies. Unless you have something to offer me?” He winked and grinned in the most flirtatious way he knew, promising the producer a hell of a good time by leaning closer and _accidentally_ rubbing his fake boobs against the man’s arm while moaning sensually into his ear. “I promise you won’t regret it...”

“Hm, that’s strange,” Ohno hummed thoughtfully, not flinching away as his reputation would’ve dictated. “I could’ve sworn I’ve seen you somewhere before... On a _really_ big screen.”

Sho choked on a lump that suddenly rose to his throat. The transmitter mic hidden behind the sunflower pendant in his bead necklace had undoubtedly caught those words because he swore he heard Nino curse in his ear.

He moved away and took a gulp of his daiquiri to numb his nerves, all the while trying to assure himself that this man couldn’t possibly recognize him under his make-up and girly ensemble.

He was so distracted by the sudden surge of anxiety that he didn’t notice Ohno had already left his seat to stand behind him, until he felt the man’s warm palms touch his bare shoulders.

He gasped at the unexpected sensation the initial contact brought, and felt his heartbeat accelerating with every gentle brush of the man’s palms up and down the slope of his _nadegata._

His soul just about left him when the man leaned forward and lightly brushed his lips against his ear. The smell of alcohol in the man’s breath tickled Sho’s nose as he whispered, “Shoko-cha~n, would you like to be in my next movie?”

In its quiet little corner of timelessness, J-san’s antique grandfather clock struck midnight...

 

∞•∞•∞•∞•∞

  
  
With each archaic chime boisterously counting down the first hour of the new day—much to the other guests drunken delight—Sho’s desperation to leave just grew.

Except that Satoshi Ohno wasn’t letting him go.

Literally.

The warmth of the man’s arms around his waist was burning through the fabric of his dress. He could barely hear Nino telling him to get out of there as his head filled with the loud pounding of his heart, making him giddy and unfit to say the TV show’s jeering punch line.

It didn’t help that the heat of Ohno’s chest against his back had quite effectively cut down his vocabulary to a few choice words—

_Fuck!_

He gasped when he felt Ohno’s fingers in his ear, and chuckled guiltily when the man pulled out the earpiece from it and flicked the device into the dregs of his daiquiri.

_I’m screwed!_

“I don’t want your friend spying on us when you _audition_ for me tonight.” In one quick movement, Ohno yanked the bead necklace over his head and threw it to the other side of the bar counter, almost hitting the meddling bartender in the head. “You promised to make it worth my time, right?”

_OH NO!_

The clock stopped knelling.

Sho’s eyes grew in both dread and shock as Ohno’s hand slipped into his skirt and cupped his crotch. He swore he felt his heart plummeting all the way down to his balls.

_SHIT!_

He shrieked and stumbled out of his stool, almost breaking his face on the edge of the counter had Ohno not been quick enough to catch him by the waist.

It didn’t take Sho a second to visualize the awkward image the two of them had created—

Of him bent over on the counter like a common whore and Ohno standing behind him in all his rugged dominance.

He heard the man let out a quiet whoop before chanting, “I knew I’ve seen you before!”

In his attempt to free himself from the producer’s manly arms, Sho’s butt brushed against the man’s crotch, felt the proof of the man’s fully functioning junk through his pants, and instantly knew why none of those desperate actresses throwing themselves at him had ever appealed to the supposedly _virtuous_ producer’s supposedly _holy_ dick.

_Shit._

 

∞•∞•∞•∞•∞

  
  
Satoshi Ohno was still smiling from the memories of the encounter an hour after _Shoko_ had stalked out of the room tripping on his high heels and flushing—undoubtedly—to the very tips of his cojones.

“How the fuck did you know?!” Matsujun demanded when they were finally alone in the bar after the guests and the sneering bartender had left.

“I got a tip. It helps to have friends in the right places.” He gulped down the rest of his whisky and hissed through biting heat that trailed down his throat.

“Aiba. I should’ve known,” Matsujun slurred, tapping his fingers on the edge of his empty wine glass.

“He probably doesn’t remember, though,” Ohno chuckled. “He was drunk out of his head when he let it slip.”

Matsujun frowned at him and asked jeeringly, “You do know that was a man, right?”

“I’m not that drunk yet, Matsujun,” he snickered. “And he did forget he was supposed to be a _woman_ when he called me a ‘pervert’ before leaving.”

“Well, he could’ve fooled me,” Matsujun refilled his glass with wine. “God seriously messed up the chromosomes on that one!”

“Hmmm,” Ohno hummed in approval, holding out his whisky glass for a shot of wine.

He’d have to agree. The man could’ve fooled him too if he hadn’t known any better.

A couple minutes passed in pensive silence before Matsujun perked up again and remarked, “You could be an actor, Ohno-kun, do you now that? You sure convinced that poor guy you wanted to fuck his ass!”

Ohno’s brows furrowed in a sudden rush of anxiety. “Do you think I scared him too much?”

“I _think_ he’ll run away from you the next time you see him.”

“Eeeeyaaah...!” he groaned in frustration, before emptying his glass in one gulp. “I may have overdone it, huh?”

“What does it matter? You probably won’t see him again.”

“I’ve kind of been hoping I would, actually.” Ohno sighed. “Can you, maybe offer him a movie or something? I’ll fund it.”

“Are you serious?!” Matsujun’s mouth hang open in shock for a full minute, while Ohno patiently waited for his friend to come to terms with his rather subtle confession about his dating preferences.

“I told you not to hang around Aiba too much,” the younger man mumbled after a while, before hiding his uncomfortable grimace behind his wine glass.

“Aiba’s good company,” Ohno insisted as he held his glass for another shot. “And _Perky Lumps_ is a life-changing movie.”

Matsujun snorted as he tipped the last shot of wine into Ohno’s glass. “His name’s Sho Sakurai, by the way.”

“Hmm...” It sure felt nice to finally be able to put a non-porno name to the face and _everything else._

“How did you even recognize him?”

Ohno simply smirked behind his glass and mumbled “I have my ways.”

He could hardly wait to see that _nadegata_ from that very specific _angle_ again.

#

**Author's Note:**

> written for [je-prompts](http://je-prompts.livejournal.com) for the prompt _Lead_.
> 
> I was thinking of [this dress](http://wkdesigner.wordpress.com/2008/09/03/ruched-empire-dress/). In red. XD


End file.
